Alternating between reading about strontium isotope levels in the bones of dead Mayans and looking up the opening themes of shows I loved at age nine. What is my life becoming?  

And Jesus Christ, I wanted to be on ZOOM so bad!  If it had worked out, I probably wouldn’t have to deal with these strontium levels.  Dammit young self, why didn’t you try harder?*

What shows did you guys love as kids?  Do you still know the theme songs word for word?  Who remembers Legends of the Hidden Temple, was that show totally baller and kind of unsettling or what?  Basically ugh college ugh Halloween weekend YOLO

*What I will be saying in fifteen years when I am still waiting tables due to never having learned my strontium levels